And when JACK says 'BEST' he means 'WEIRDEST'.
But, if you're ever looking for an excuse to be late JACK would probably use one of these.
DISCLAIMER: We don't expect them to work 100% of the time.
"I knocked myself out in the shower."
"I was drunk and forgot which Waffle House I parked my car next to."
"Someone robbed the gas station I was at, and I didn't have enough gas to get to another station."
"I dreamed that I got fired."
"There was a stranger sleeping in my car."
"I'm NOT late . . . I was thinking about work on the way in."
"I had to wait for the judge to set my bail."