There are many reasons why you shouldn't drive impaired. Especially because, in your altered state, you will make ridiculous excuses for your crime upon being confronted with it. You'll do something like blame it on circus animals.
Clowns are people too, the most frightening creatures on Earth, but people nonetheless. While DWI's usually nothing to laugh about, we find the thought of a clown drunkenly driving a stolen golf cart hilarious.
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