A Yahoo article came out this week that America’s Sweetheart, Snooki, (aka America’s Human Annoyance) has dropped 10 pounds and is now a size 4.

Not to knock her efforts. I mean, I think she’s ruined our society and all, but I have to give props to anyone who loses weight. Especially when all you do is eat and drink. It’s not easy. I know if my only job was to go out and be a piece a trash, I would definitely not be stopping at the gym.

But she’s Snooki. She’s known for having an…um…ample figure. And it pains me to see how we’ve catapulted her to the top. Does she get to be skinny too?

I’m totally playing the “it’s not fair” card here. And now I’m approaching my diet differently. From here on out it’s just Ron-Ron juice and fried pickles for me. (And I’ll also get more exercise by kicking my own ass for even knowing what she likes.)